Jessica Nelson

About

A moment I have seen more than once: someone finishes describing a conversation they have been dreading for months and then looks really puzzled, because in the telling it sounded far more manageable than it had felt in prospect. The dread and the event rarely match. That gap is worth examining carefully. Coming out is almost always imagined in its worst version, and the imagined version is what people plan around, which is why the planning is often more punishing than the reality. We work with realistic forecasts instead of catastrophic ones, and we prepare for the difficult responses without assuming that all of them will be difficult. I also supervise clinicians who are earlier on, and this is the pattern I most often ask them to look for. The rehearsal is usually worse than the performance. If you have been rehearsing something for months, bring it here.