Hiroko Sato

About

There is a persistent idea that seeking help means something has gone seriously wrong at home. In practice the households I see are usually functioning; they are just functioning at a cost that nobody has stopped to calculate. Raising kids well is not the same as finding it easy, and the people who find it hardest are often the ones taking it most seriously. We look at what the current arrangement is costing you and whether that cost is actually necessary. Often a surprising portion of it turns out to be optional once someone says so out loud. My upbringing was full of caregiving and absorbed early the assumption that you simply keep going. It took me a long time to notice that this is not a plan. If you have been keeping going without calculating the cost, come and calculate it. Naming the cost out loud is usually the first thing that changes anything.