Abigail Wang

About

My belief about this is that the aim is not to feel better about the death. The aim is to be able to carry it without it consuming the parts of your life that are still yours, which is a different and a lot more achievable objective. That distinction matters practically. Grieving people are often offered comfort when what they actually need is company and a bit of shape to the week, and comfort tends to arrive with an implicit request that they cheer up. There is no such request here. You can be exactly as sad as you are for as long as it lasts. I first sat on the other side of this myself, and what helped was someone who did not need me to improve on any particular schedule. That is what I try to offer. If you are tired of being cheered up, get in touch.