Rohan Iyer

About

Why does this keep going the same way? That question brings more people to me than any other, usually after a period they had really hoped would turn out differently. Dating repeatedly without much changing is tiring, and the standard advice to simply be yourself is close to useless when the difficulty is that being yourself has not been going well. We look instead at what you are selecting for, what you tolerate longer than you should, and what you do at the exact point things start to matter. Those are specific and changeable. Working in hospital and intensive outpatient programs gave me a fairly unromantic view of how people actually operate, which turns out to be useful here. I will not offer you platitudes. If the same thing keeps happening, get in touch. These are not personality traits and they are not permanent features of who you are. They respond well to being examined properly.